We have just got into the habit of not really unpacking. All our things are already in freestanding drawers or packed into boxes into shelves. It isn't the best way to live because I am very much a person who likes things to have their place...it may not always be in that particular place because i will leave it out when I am having messy days...but that place will always be there for it to return to. Thinking about it this is very much how life is for me..and it has always been like this ever since I left home in 2001 when I was 18. I moved from Italy to England and I have never really found my own place as such. I still, 8 years on, haven't settled. My place is back home with my parents. Incidentally they have moved back to South Africa since i left home but Home is Where the Heart is...and the saying holds true. I feel that until I have settled properly and have made a place for myself my heart will always be with Mom and Dad at home, no matter where they are in the world. Sure, being away from them is so so hard and sometimes i feel that precious time together is being lost as we are so so so far apart. I wish that they were just down the road so that i could pop round for tea or have sunday lunch together. I never realised how good I had it at home and how much my family means to me until I left. What I wouldn't give to have that back. I want to be back at high school, all I had to worry about was passing my exams and which friends I was going to spend the weekends with. Now the worries of everyday life have consumed me and I have lost who I am. My main comfort is that I have my home/my place to go back to, a Steph shaped place waiting for me to be put back into, even if it is for two weeks of the year.
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